Why Doesn't my boyfriend want to have sex with me anymore?

Hi, I have the same problem with my bf. We started off with a strong sexual connection and now im lucky to get 5 minutes of his time in bed. He puts more effort into it if i dress up for him but how long will that last. I afraid it will only get worse over time.

I think it is great that you are protecting his feelings here. I also find it distressing that like me, you can't get a straight answer from him. I am hoping you find an solution to the problem. It is my opinion that if they opened up that half the battle would be won. This is something that could be and should be dealt with together but when the men do not participate in the solution it makes it that much more difficult. I am in 2 yr relationship going through the same thing as you are so my heart goes out to you. Mine just shuts me out and is quite rude to me when I try to talk about it. I get, all you want is sex and then he becomes very mean and makes remarks I would expect out of a child. Good luck!

Well, i was dating my boyfriend for 5 months. when we first got together we had sex at least 6 times a day/night. but one time around a month after we first started dating he randomly got sick, just a random flu. ever since he got sick, even when he was better, our sex life just wasn't the same. we ended up doing it once a night, then to 4 times a week then to 2 a week and eventually to nun. i was so sexually frustrated that i ended up leaving the relationship because i gave myself the impression he didn't find me attractive anymore. near the end of the relationship i felt like a fool, i was constantly begging and asking why can't we? and his excuse always was i'm too tired i'm stressed.... when he doesn't even have a job or school? i was constantly asking if he wanted 4 play instead of sex or even just oral for him, but it was always no... i have my suspicions and i accused him of cheating, that didn't go down too well. i really miss him and i still love him it's been a month since we've been broken up and i still cry every night about it, but i'm just a sook, i hope everything goes good in your relationship! (:

Latley my boyfriend and I have been arguing so much. Its an everday basis almost. I mean its killing me how bad we fight. He claims that I "dont care about our realtionship anymore" that I've "changed and not loving or caring" like I use to be. I thought he might have been right, so I changed every outlook I had on things. I started being more positive and more loving and caring then ever before. Then he said it again! Now we NEVER make love. Everytime I want to do so he just replies with "I'm tired" "Later baby" or "I dont feel like it". I am so afraid that he is cheating on me and if not then mayber even worse. Falling out of love with me. I dont know what to do anymore. I've tried everything from cosmopolitan sex moves to counseling myself to change for our realtionship. Please help me, I am in some desperate need of some good wholesome help. We've been dating for over a year and this has all just happened in the last month and a half. Before this we never fought. Now its just so terrible it makes me feel like I should just call it quits before its already too late. HELPPPPP!

Ive been married for almost 7 yrs now. Last year somewhere around September, is when i first noticed a change in my sex life with my husband. He had such a high sex drive. i dont know what happened. Now instead of him chasing me for sex, i found myself chasing him. Seemed like i was being a bother so i left him alone, waiting for him to want me. i pleasure myself to sleep almost everynight. I even cry afterwards sometimes.
i dont think hes cheating on me. i dont mean to toot my own horn but im not bad looking at all. I just feel that we are too young to be going through this already. I am 31 he's 32. I definatly know that he was'nt bored with the sex. Im the open one. I'm the one who wants to try new things, the one who will do anything to please my man. ive talked to him and tell him how im feeling. He tells me that his job is tireding.That he may need to start taking vitamins. I bought him vitamins three weeks ago. We had sex last Saturday, he came in under 2 min. This also happened the last time we had sex as well, which was about three weeks before that Saturday. And this is not like him at all. He would last for hours at a time.
I do sometime think of being with other men. I dream about it almost everynight. If he was just a boyfriend, I would have been gone by now. But he is my husband, the father of my kids. I love him, but i want the old him back. Im married, but im lonely and unwanted.

I HAVE THE SAME PROBLEM I HAVENT HAD SEX IN MONTHS, I FEEL LIKE IT IS ME AND MAKES ME DEPRESSED... I EVEN THINK HE IS CHEATING ... I AM AT THE POINT NOW WHERE I REALLY FEEL IT IS ME, BUT I TRY TO MAKE THIS RELATIONSHIP WORK, BUT TO ME SEX IS ALOT TO DO WITH A COUPLE SO I UNDERSTAND.... IF U FIND U ANSWER PLEASE HELP ME... L.O.L

I haven't read through everyone's comments but have found myself here because I am looking for an answer that may not exist. To clarify, I have a very beautiful wife and I do not want to have sex anymore. The reason, its the same thing every time. Unfortunately, no matter how gentley or subversively I have tried to coax her to be a little more dynamic it doesn't work; primaily because she cannot accept te fact that she may be lacking in some way and therefore the slightest hint of something means days of upset and not talking. Over time I have come to accept this fact to the extent where I have gone from a being a very sexual being to acceptance that I just won't have good sex and so would rather not bother. And no, I am not having an affair nor I am I interested in one. I have accepted my lot - no more, no less. If you wanna know more, just ask.

I am having the same problem with my boyfriend, the wierd thing is he almost always is hard when he wakes up in the morning and doesnt want to do anything with me. We used to have sex everytime we saw each other and now we have spent 5 nights together in the past 2 weeks and nothing. I dont want to ask for it because I dont want him to do it just to shut me up. Its getting me really down on myself that he doesnt want to do anything but cuddle with me anymore. I miss the physical part of the relationship.

Seriously guys, come on. Be truthful. I love sex!! Lets not deny it and I am a female in my late 20's. If I could I would do it all day long but men are men and seriously can I be bothered? ha ha. They are not intelligent creatures. I have the most satifying relationship with my man and we simple just don't have the time with our busy schedules called LIFE! We, females, sit here and analyse is he cheating is he not. Well come to grips, reality is, it is life! At the end of the day if he is cheating, trust me you will eventually find out. Don't waste your time and think what if he is, is he, could he?. If you keep channeling that energy, you will create it! Just enjoy the fact you breath and have a relationship, some don't! Put on some sexy lingerie and seduce him! Works a treat! If it (your relationship) doesn't work out, then clearly it was not meant to be!! And trust your Mum when she says, " there are plenty more fish in the sea". Cause it is so true. If all else fails remember "this is your life, so live it the [offensive slang removed] way you want to. Screw everyone else. You only have one shot at it! Don't be unhappy!". :)