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The start of my most recent period was on Feb 26 - projected ovulation date being March 14, projected next period March 28 (via MyMonthlyCycles, where I have been keeping track of my period for 1 year). Average cycle - 30 days.
We had protected intercourse on March 3 and 24. The condom didn't break; slipped down maybe an inch but we pushed it right back up.
Now my period is 3 or 4 days late (depending if you count the 28th), with no usual signs of cramping etc that I normally get. Took two HPT's and both came out negative. Discharge looks normal, no tenderness of breasts or anything. I have had a little bit of an upset stomach but I think I may just be getting sick - I am under quite a bit of stress.
I know it's unlikely that I am pregnant, but I am paranoid since I can't afford to have a child right now. I have heard that stress really can throw off a regular period (I have been regular for 8 years now), but I have a hard time believing it since I am so paranoid... help? I don't know what's wrong with me!
Have a GYNO appt coming up in a month, but I'm the type of person who likes to know without going to the doc! It sure would be nice if my period would come!
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thank you so much but I have tried to be a good boyfriend and let her decide on her own to go to doctor...she is so stubborn for some reason. She says she doesnt need to go but i know better...any advice to help ease her worries and make an appt to go?
December 13, 2009 - 8:17pmThis Comment
Well, as you know, it is ultimately her decision, and you can play an important role by:
1. Going to the doctor yourself when you experience pain (be a good role model)
2. Take care of your health and well-being, and encourage her to do the same (again with the role model ideal)
3. Provide her with information in a nurturing manner (timing is everything; wait for her to share her concern regarding her symptoms, and have information handy for her), so she can make an informed decision to go or not to go to the doctor.
Many women experience pain during their cycle, and it may be nothing to be concerned about. Pain can be associated with, or caused by, many different factors, but usually pain that has not been experienced before, and lasts more than a few days, and is described as "severe" should be medically evaluated by a doctor to rule out any medical conditions. In lieu of this "perfect scenario", here is information about an ovarian cyst and its symptoms (I'm wondering why she automatically assumed it was a cyst; does this condition run in her family?). If so, she is most likely being checked for this during annual exams with her Gynecologist (do you know when her next appointment is scheduled?). If she does not have one scheduled, and she needs to since she is sexually active on an annual basis, perhaps you can provide the motivation and positive reinforcement by taking her to her favorite place the evening of her appointment? :-)
Symptoms of Ovarian Cysts include:
Most ovarian cysts do not cause symptoms. When they do, pelvic pain and irregular menstrual bleeding are the two most common symptoms. Pain is usually caused by:
* Direct pressure from the cysts on the ovaries and surrounding structures
o This causes chronic pelvic fullness or a dull ache.
* Bleeding from a cyst into and around the ovary
o This causes more intense, sharp pain as the blood irritates the lining of the abdomen.
Pain may come and go on a regular basis. Or it may be more noticeable just before or after your period or during sex.
Other symptoms:
* Urinary discomfort associated with bladder pressure or irritation
* Nausea
* Diarrhea
Again, thanks for being concerned and helping your girlfriend take care of her health. You can show her the information you found, and she may not have these exact symptoms and want to do what is called "watchful waiting" (usually done by a doctor after a medical exam, but it works in this scenario) to see if symptoms re-appear.
The only last piece of advice I have, if she continues to have bothersome symptoms that cause her pain, worry and stress, is to talk with her about her fears of going to the doctor. Has she, or a family member, had a previous bad experience? Sometimes just having someone to vent to, and ease fears (or just listen without trying to "fix" the problems), is a huge help. Are her fears emotional, physical, financial or something else? You two can problem-solve together, if this is what she needs. Otherwise, she may have just experienced pain on a one-time-basis, and this can be common and nothing to be concerned about.
December 13, 2009 - 9:20pmThis Comment
Just an update: Her period started today so no pregnancy. A relief to both of us...But I took your advice and asked her to think about making an appointment and she agreed to think about making one after the new year since things will be hectic between then and now. So we are definitely making progress. Thanks for the advice.
December 14, 2009 - 6:01pmThis Comment
Im glad to see this question..for the last year I have been very regular and all of a sudden no period..im on a 25 day cycle and now Im on day 33..thinking its stress since I had a tubal with my last child. If it is stress and or lack of sleep is there anything I can take to help supplement my system or release the stress?
December 6, 2009 - 10:19pmj320
This Comment
Hi,
It is common for women to be late on their period--or even miss a period entirely--for no "apparent" reason. Our ovulation and menstrual cycles do vary from month-to-month, and can change due to recent illness, new medication, excess stress, etc. There are also medical reasons that women will stop menstruating, and can be evaluated by your doctor (doctors are not usually concerned if you are not experiencing any problematic symptoms until you have missed 2 or 3 periods in-a-row).
However, the most common reason for a missed period is pregnancy. I understand you had a tubal ligation (not sure how long ago?), which is about 100% effective, but have you considered taking a home pregnancy test...just to rule this possibility out of the equation?
As far as what you can take to relieve stress or help you sleep, there really are no good supplements beyond controlling the trigger or cause to each of these. I am not sure if your lack of sleep is medically related, if you have young children or babies in the house, or if your sleep environment is less-than-perfect...is there anything you can change to help you sleep that is within your control?
Same goes for stress, and depends what is causing the stress (trigger), how you are managing the stress (what have you already tried), options to lessen the stressors in your life and problem-solve and/or options to lessen your physical/emotional reactions to the stressors.
Let us know how we can help in any of these categories!
December 6, 2009 - 10:55pmThis Comment
Thank you for your help..I did take a pregnancy test and it was negative..I guess what is worrying me are the other things my body is doing...having to urinate often, heartburn, nausia..but then these things could also be do to lack of sleep which is due to work and having to make ends meet on my own. I will wait it out and see if it continues next month I guess...I dont want to be one of the people who say "they didnt know they were pregnant since their body didnt give the typical signs.
December 7, 2009 - 9:56pmThis Comment
Jenn320,
Most women (except for TV) DO know when they are pregnant...it is very difficult to ignore!...so don't worry about being one of those women. You sound like you are very much in-tune with your body.
Other symptoms that you describe (frequent urination, heartburn, nausea) could be caused by many other factors, and we would love to help you with these. These, coupled with your stressful situation are definitely worthy of more discussion, and other women can help as well who have been in your shoes.
If you are interested, it would be helpful to begin another ASK discussion thread (so as not to post this on the pregnancy-related ASK thread), and we can help with your continued symptoms...while knowing that you are confirmed not pregnant.
Hope to hear from you again soon!
December 13, 2009 - 8:42amThis Comment
Hi, Lichadoll. Welcome to EmpowHer! Let's see if we can put your mind at ease a little bit.
If your last period was on November 3, and you are usually about every 28 days, that means you were most likely ovulating somewhere around Nov. 17-19. November 24th would be almost a week later. That, combined with the fact that your boyfriend wore a condom and that it worked correctly and did not break, tells me that you are 99.99% most likely fine.
Even if you HAD gotten pregnant that day, which I do not think was really possible, you would not have begun having symptoms just three days later. Usually the first symptoms do not start until about the time of a missed period, and even then they can be very very light.
On the other hand, look what's been going on:
1. Your guilt over having sex
2. A busy family holiday where you sit down with the very people you feel guilty around.
3. A very emotional breakup with your boyfriend.
4. An emotional, fast 15-pound weight loss. (This in itself is enough to make you late, even without the rest)
5. Changes in your sleep and eating patterns
6. Stress over school
7. Worry about pregnancy.
That IS a train wreck, doll. That is enough to stop your period for like three months. When we are this stressed, our body stops producing our regular hormones and starts producing more stress hormones like cortisol and adrenalin because it senses that we are in danger of some kind. (The body still reacts to our fear or panic as though a tiger was chasing us in the cave-man days. And when that tiger is chasing us, we don't need a pregnancy, we need to FIGHT or we need to RUN. So it gives us extra fighting and running strength and stops the reproduction hormones. This is called the fight-or-flight response.)
My personal thoughts are this: That there's only the tiniest, tiniest of chances you could be pregnant. Rather, I think you have been stressed beyond words this month and the stress has messed with your hormones. You certainly can take a home pregnancy test to help you be sure, but what I expect is that your period will start in the next week or so. In the meantime, it's very important that you relax some, that you breathe, and that you try to get your world a little more back to normal.
Can you do that? Will you try to breathe, and be a little calmer, and help your body get back to normal?
December 4, 2009 - 10:01amThis Comment
I am so thankful that I found this site! Everyone seems so kind and willing to help. Even if the questions tend to become a tad repetitive. You all have answered each one precisely, carefully, and with what seems like genuine concern. I really can't even express how happy I am right now! I'm only 18, and come from a family where discussing my sexual health is absolutely taboo, and would result in complete ostracization. Believe me. I once asked for them to sit down and discuss with me their views on me getting birth control. I told them that it was for just in case. And they basically told me I'd go to hell for even popping one pill. (I'm religious as well, but they are like the psycho couple from across the street, in the white house you see in movies.) Of course I love them, but I wish I had more understanding role models. But I'm past that stage. I've made my own decisions, and I'm so glad now that I finally have somewhere to go to for help. Thank you.
Alrighty! I'm just going to jump into it then. It may seem silly, but I've always been a very paranoid person, and I need to hear facts for relief. Please and thank you!
I've had regular periods since I was about 16, always around every 28 days. My last period was on November 3rd. Well I lost my virginity on the 24th of November, and I thought everything was alright, (we used a condom, and it didn't break. It didn't even hurt. I was really happy, and thankful I waited till I was ready.) But on Thanksgiving morning I started feeling really nauseous, and I had trouble finishing my food. This faded, but was still present the rest of the day. Since then it's been on and off. But I have a constant abdomen like pain across my whole tummy, not necessarily painful, but as if I'm recovering from doing 100 crunches. It concerns me, but it's not really a hindrance, I've just been living with it (I'm thinking it may have to something with losing my virginity, but it's been over a week.) Anyway, two days ago I missed my period. I called my boyfriend, and he said that he's 99.9% sure there's nothing to worry about. But my paranoid self keeps thinking that somehow, maybe some pre cum... I'm just so scared!
But! Of course there's more. I have also been under an INSANE amount of stress this month. First my boyfriend and I have been together for nearly nine months, and he broke up with me a couple of days before our anniversary. And yup, another girl was involved. I was a mess. I went from being 125 l.b.s, to 110 l.b.s in two weeks. Again I had no one to talk to, all my friends did was bad mouth him. And even though I know they had good intentions, it still made me mad. Then they expect me to fix their problems. I started having new struggles at work with the new supervisor. I caught the beginnings of my sisters cold (sore throat/ sniffly nose) Then my boyfriend and I worked things out, but I was still a little mad. We ended up sleeping together (which I was actually okay with) but every time I see my parents I get this twang of guilt. And even though I want to, I really feel like I shouldn't do it anymore. We got in a tiny fight the other night on the phone, and I nearly had a panic attack when we hung up, I just kept crying over the silliest thing. While last night I had to write an eight page paper on a huge novel I hadn't even read, I haven't had any sleep in over 48 hours. And to top it off I have even more finals next week!
I've had a few PMS symptoms since the 24th: sore breasts and thighs, crying spells, lower back ache, breaking out, mood swings.... BUT EARLY PREGNACY SYMPTOMS ARE PRETTY MUCH THE SAME THING!
They don't feel like they normally do. They're all so... mild. Like, practically nothing. I'm usually equivalent to a train wreck when I PMS. And strangely enough I have zero cramps. Usually they're so bad I can't go anywhere.
I'm so scared. I'm terrified. I'm going to buy a EPT tomorrow. But I always hear stories about how the test said one thing, then they never got their periods, then BAM! Prego. I can't have a baby. But I can't have an abortion either...
My sore tummy is starting to scare me, and the nausea especially.
Please help! What are your thoughts? Thank you, thank you!
December 3, 2009 - 9:49pmThis Comment
Hello Diane,
December 1, 2009 - 5:25pmthank you so much for responding! Your answer certainly gave me some peace of mind. I am doing a blood test in the next few days so I am assuming if there is anything actually wrong with me I will find out then. I haven't had any real big changes in terms of diet or medication, but I suppose I have been under a lot of stress lately with my job, etc. I guess I should just wait it out and hope it comes soon. Hopefully you are right and I'm not pregnant. I will try to stop worrying. Thank you!
This Comment