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Am i depressed?

By Anonymous October 28, 2009 - 8:34pm
 
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I really don't know how to describe this really, cause i don't know how i feel. I feel as if i'm not really here. If i was stood in a crowd, i feel i don't belong and as if i'm invisable. I feel sad/down all the time and don't know what to do to be happy. I've lost interest in friends and don't want to go out or do anything. I just feel tired all the time, like i could sleep for days. I've been like this for over a year now and i don't know what to do tho feel better. I have never thought about killing myself and i don't now, but one time months ago, i don't remember why i was upset and wanted to disapear and cutting my wrists just came in my head and as it did my wrists felt as if the were burning as if i could feel the blood pumping through like they wanted me to do it. Was that a suicidal thought? I want to get out of this but i don't know what to do. I don't want to go to a doctor cause i feel daft and don't know what to say. Is there anything i could take or do to feel happy?

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Anon,

The things you describe are very real symptoms of depression. Especially feeling sad, tired, and withdrawn from people and things that you used to enjoy.

Like Rosa asked, what has been happening in your life in the last year or 18 months? Did you make a big move or a change? Did you lose a loved one, or a job, perhaps? Did you start on any new medicines, or change your diet and exercise pattern? Has something happened that started you off feeling this way?

Depression is nothing to be ashamed of, Anon. Many of us experience it at some time in our lives. And it's not something that you can just "pull yourself out of" by trying harder or ignoring it. I have suffered from depression myself and I know that it can be very successfully treated. People who are depressed can be helped with talk therapy and/or with medication, on a short- or long-term basis depending on what they need.

You don't feel like you right now, do you? I know that feeling. But you can get back there.

Here's some information on depression, its symptoms, diagnosis and treatment:

https://www.empowher.com/media/reference/depression#definition

The Mayo Clinic has a thorough, readable page on depression:

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/depression/DS00175

Be sure to click on the blue links on the side of the page; they lead to more info. Here's an excerpt from their information page:

"Depression is one of the most common health conditions in the world. Depression isn't a weakness, nor is it something that you can simply "snap out of." Depression, formally called major depression, major depressive disorder or clinical depression, is a medical illness that involves the mind and body. It affects how you think and behave and can cause a variety of emotional and physical problems. You may not be able to go about your usual daily activities, and depression may make you feel as if life just isn't worth living anymore."

And this:

"Effective diagnosis and treatment can help reduce even severe depression symptoms. And with effective treatment, most people with depression feel better, often within weeks, and can return to the daily activities they previously enjoyed."

I understand that you feel hesitant about talking with a doctor. But you shouldn't. There are millions of Americans who are dealing with depression, and your doctor will treat you in the same way as if you were talking about physical pain or sickness: She or he will ask about your symptoms, ask how long they have been going on, rule out any physical problems, and perhaps prescribe medication to help. Your doctor may also be able to refer you to a therapist; you may also be able to find one on your own by searching for Psychologists or for Behavioral Health and your city.

Do you have medical insurance? With a medical diagnosis of depression, your medicine and even your therapy will probably be covered.

What more could we do to help you? Like Rosa said, if you tell us what city and state you're in, we could find some names of doctors and/or therapists where you live.

Hang in there. You don't want to feel like this forever, and you don't have to. Take care and write us back soon, ok?

October 30, 2009 - 8:31am

Dear Anon,

Thank you for your post and welcome to EmpowHer.

I am very sorry you are feeling this way. Did something happen a year ago that you now feel this way? Or did it just all of a sudden happen?

I am not a psychologist, but it definitely sounds like you could use someone to talk to and who is willing to help. Where are you located? We can probably help you find a doctor in your area who can help.

Please keep us posted. You are not alone in the world and are not the only one that has ever felt this way-- try to remember that. Looking forward to hearing from you again.

October 29, 2009 - 5:59am
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