I agree; I think ALL parents have similar stories like this one. We are taught that doctors are the primary source of all information and caring for our health. My son was born two months early, and had a (relatively) short stay in the NICU. I had a difficult recovery from delivery, and was not able to spend the night in the NICU, even if they didn't have "visiting hours" that ended at 9pm. The first 2 weeks of my life as a new mom, my son went through procedures and tests that I didn't even KNOW about until I read his discharge papers! (oh, the doctors would spout-out what was done the previous day during their rounds, as I'm desperately trying to breastfeed my baby behind a flimsy hospital curtain and trying to maneuver him in such a way so that his tubes and IVs and monitors don't come out and set off the alarms...wow, thinking back on this, I'm amazed at what we went through!
Luckily, we had AMAZING doctors. Some were not good, as the ones who breezed by us during their rounds treated us like objects (I felt like I was on TV; it was that contrived). However, we wrote down what they said (which made them slow down), and then the nurse and other doctors we saw we would ask them "what it meant". I received enough information to then do some research on the internet, ande that also helped me to ask "better" questions. Ugh...but it was all AFTER the procedures and I wasn't there for the little guy to console him (I was horrified that the "jury is still out" as to whether newborns feel pain the same way older kids/adults do; some don't receive pain medication for minor surgery!).
It's also a tough balance between consoling your child, and letting others console him/her. A few times, I let a nurse console my child during shots, and she was wonderful (I was right there). It was honestly difficult to tell whether my feelings were my 'instincts' telling me I should console him and not the nurse, or if I was just nervous with his crying.
I've found for me, that sometimes it is helpful for my son to know that there are other kind, nice, caring people who can offer emotional support for my son; I don't want to be the only in his life to be able to console him. What a difficult balance that I'm still trying to explore.
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I agree; I think ALL parents have similar stories like this one. We are taught that doctors are the primary source of all information and caring for our health. My son was born two months early, and had a (relatively) short stay in the NICU. I had a difficult recovery from delivery, and was not able to spend the night in the NICU, even if they didn't have "visiting hours" that ended at 9pm. The first 2 weeks of my life as a new mom, my son went through procedures and tests that I didn't even KNOW about until I read his discharge papers! (oh, the doctors would spout-out what was done the previous day during their rounds, as I'm desperately trying to breastfeed my baby behind a flimsy hospital curtain and trying to maneuver him in such a way so that his tubes and IVs and monitors don't come out and set off the alarms...wow, thinking back on this, I'm amazed at what we went through!
Luckily, we had AMAZING doctors. Some were not good, as the ones who breezed by us during their rounds treated us like objects (I felt like I was on TV; it was that contrived). However, we wrote down what they said (which made them slow down), and then the nurse and other doctors we saw we would ask them "what it meant". I received enough information to then do some research on the internet, ande that also helped me to ask "better" questions. Ugh...but it was all AFTER the procedures and I wasn't there for the little guy to console him (I was horrified that the "jury is still out" as to whether newborns feel pain the same way older kids/adults do; some don't receive pain medication for minor surgery!).
It's also a tough balance between consoling your child, and letting others console him/her. A few times, I let a nurse console my child during shots, and she was wonderful (I was right there). It was honestly difficult to tell whether my feelings were my 'instincts' telling me I should console him and not the nurse, or if I was just nervous with his crying.
I've found for me, that sometimes it is helpful for my son to know that there are other kind, nice, caring people who can offer emotional support for my son; I don't want to be the only in his life to be able to console him. What a difficult balance that I'm still trying to explore.
April 12, 2008 - 12:32pmThis Comment
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