What identifies me
Not work, not family members, not personality, my core values identify me
There's no need to censor yourself and feel like you cannot comment. That's why community is so great. Every individual has their own experiences, thoughts, and opinions and is entitled to sharing. It's great that you are optimistic, as optimism isn't always easy to find. I'm sure the people that you know in your life appreciate it. Because everyone has had different experiences, optimism simply isn't for everyone. Finding out what works best for you without compromising your integrity is what matters.
If you've live a life in which you are kind and loving to others, I don't see how anyone could not "want" or appreciate you. Maybe you're being too hard on yourself! Maybe it's time to start being more optimistic and forgiving to yourself! Your life and identity rest solely on your own perspective. We all have our own stories about how our life has played our thus far, and as you know, memories aren't always a replica of reality. They're muddled with emotions and different states of mind. Maybe it's time to change your life story. Change your perspective.
Try to start being more positive in your outlook of yourself and of your life. Keep your chin up and turn those lemons into whatever you want! After all, we only live once.
DanielleMay 30, 2012 - 7:06am
I wasn't really speaking of myself, just being philosophical. I have never found love in my entire life and I wouldn't know what it was to be really loved and cared for. Sure, I've had a few friends but as for self identity, it stinks. I have a very poor self image because I have been slapped down at every turn in the road, so I turn to philosophy and what I think would be nice. On my death bed nothing will matter but my relationship with my heavenly Father. People don't matter in the end. We leave this world behind and everything in it. It will be no more. I look forward to death; the sooner the better. I am very tired of living in this messed up world. I may sound bitter and right this minute I am. I have just been hurt very badly. But that too will pass and life moves on, maybe to something better, maybe not. I wish life and my identity were cheerier, happier, but in reality it hasn't been. I was never wanted and I guess I've carried that with me all my life. Maybe that is why it has been what it has, I don't know. I try to love and care and be kind to others, but I certainly don't expect it back. It is nice when it is but that doesn't often happen. I'll stop here and make no more comments. bbnrseMay 26, 2012 - 6:04pm
This is a question I've asked my father. He will soon be 100 years old. He said, treating others as you would like to be treated. He lived his life according to the Beatitudes...with people outside of the family. He was not a family man or good father, but he had a good career and helped a lot of people. He was a clinical psychologist. He worked for the VA after WWII and taught for many years at the Univ. of MD. I believe in treating people right, being nice to them even when they are not nice to you, but there is more to it than that. I believe truly caring for others from the heart is paramount. Loving others when you are not loved back is key to building strong, healthy relationships. I don't mean you should let people walk all over you, just respond with kindness rather than bitterness. Keeping a positive attitude when things are not going well is also important. Just a few of my thoughts. bbnrseMay 26, 2012 - 7:30am
When your lying on your deathbed....what will really matter? Wealth and career success or the relationships we have held with people and the contributions we have made to others.October 28, 2011 - 3:17pm
External stuff is deceiving, internal core values provide my true identityJune 23, 2011 - 1:10pm
You are so right. I do need to change my outlook on life, on my life. I have always felt my life as negative and it really hasn't been. There have been a lot of good things happen to me. There have been lots of happy times in my life. I just haven't chosen to focus on them and you are right, it is about time I did. If I thought more positively I'd remember more positive things happening. I never understood how I stayed so optimistic, but I have. I know that optimism is a good thing and I want to have some good quality. I care so much for others that I never took the time to care about myself. Thank you for calling me on it. I need to be a bit more realistic and not so one sided in my thinking about my own life. I feel negative and talk positive. I need to balance things out more. Life can and is good if you let it or allow it to be. Thanks. bbnrseMay 30, 2012 - 9:50am