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Anonymous

I don't recall my log in. My husband took his life in 2012. He was high functioning autistic but it was never diagnosed and since this was a marriage later in our lives, it wasn't as noticeable as it may have been when he was much younger. Much has happened in my life since his death but everything is still tied to him because there is so much to get through before I can even experience/live my life in a more positive manner. Having a support system would be nice but I don't have too much in that arena. I have been fortunate to literally Push myself into taking a class that I have not been able to utilize the information yet due to my stress and feeling like I'm just coming out from post traumatic stress, but the good thing of the class besides the information is that I did meet two women with whom I sometimes communicate and we do get together sometimes. That connection has been heavenly sent and much appreciated. I've learned much about autism and now I am learning about shock and grief. For me, it is so emotional and yet I know but it's difficult to understand that to my late husband, his life and death (due to the autism) could have been a "to do" check list for the day. My mind has done all the questioning: I should have, would have, could have, or could I, or was it, or was it not, and dozens more. May all those who suffer loss, find peace and love.

August 16, 2014 - 12:28am

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