This is an old thread and probably nobody will read it, but I just need to get this off my chest. My boyfriend and I are 19, and we have been over a year together. I have more experience on sex than he does, but we never really talked about it cause I don't want him to feel pressured. We don't have many places where we can have complete privacy, but I always look for options like motels, my house. Still, he is never really into it. I am always the one that tries to initiate it and he only makes up dumb excuses like "I want to perform well but...", "I don't have time", "I feel pressured". Of course I give him his space, but it kills me because I feel unwanted and undesired. I have suggested a lot of options, ranging from going to a doctor to meeting other people.. But he is very jealous and I don't understand him. He can't bear the thought of me being (sexually or not ) with someone else, but he doesn't really want me for him either. This has taken a toll on me, because I love him and he loves me too, but we fight daily and are always an on and off couple. I have tried spicing things up, as we used to have a lot of phone sex when our relationship started, but even that is just plain sad now. All my male friends compliment me, and a lot would probably sleep with me given the chance. So, why doesn't he?
What he does recently, is that he beggins touching me when I am upset or stressed out, and I proceed to try to to do something to please him because I want him to be happy and satisfied with me. But it all feels like he is giving me a pity fuck. And it is worse. Plus, we haven't had actual penetration in months, just the things that come before. And he tends to be way too rough, like he feels obliged to do something he doesn't want to do, and he leaves bruises on my body.
Does anyone have a suggestion? I do believe we love each other and we are not perfect, but we are still a team. Sex is not everything yet I am way too young to be in a sexless relationship. Are we turning toxic for each other? Cause it seems to me that although we try so hard to make it work, we are far from succeeding. Sorry for the long post.
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This is an old thread and probably nobody will read it, but I just need to get this off my chest. My boyfriend and I are 19, and we have been over a year together. I have more experience on sex than he does, but we never really talked about it cause I don't want him to feel pressured. We don't have many places where we can have complete privacy, but I always look for options like motels, my house. Still, he is never really into it. I am always the one that tries to initiate it and he only makes up dumb excuses like "I want to perform well but...", "I don't have time", "I feel pressured". Of course I give him his space, but it kills me because I feel unwanted and undesired. I have suggested a lot of options, ranging from going to a doctor to meeting other people.. But he is very jealous and I don't understand him. He can't bear the thought of me being (sexually or not ) with someone else, but he doesn't really want me for him either. This has taken a toll on me, because I love him and he loves me too, but we fight daily and are always an on and off couple. I have tried spicing things up, as we used to have a lot of phone sex when our relationship started, but even that is just plain sad now. All my male friends compliment me, and a lot would probably sleep with me given the chance. So, why doesn't he?
July 26, 2017 - 6:29pmWhat he does recently, is that he beggins touching me when I am upset or stressed out, and I proceed to try to to do something to please him because I want him to be happy and satisfied with me. But it all feels like he is giving me a pity fuck. And it is worse. Plus, we haven't had actual penetration in months, just the things that come before. And he tends to be way too rough, like he feels obliged to do something he doesn't want to do, and he leaves bruises on my body.
Does anyone have a suggestion? I do believe we love each other and we are not perfect, but we are still a team. Sex is not everything yet I am way too young to be in a sexless relationship. Are we turning toxic for each other? Cause it seems to me that although we try so hard to make it work, we are far from succeeding. Sorry for the long post.
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