i look back and I hate myself, for not being a different kind of person. if i were a different kind of person, i would have kicked him out the first time it happened. instead all i did was cry and try to prove that i knew how to cook and i tried to lose weight and i tried be ambitious enough for him and tried to be good enough for him and i never was.
But... it makes sense. Me, thinking it was normal for the man I love to make me cry. After all, the first man in my life was good at making me cry. My dad was good at that especially when he was drunk.
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i look back and I hate myself, for not being a different kind of person. if i were a different kind of person, i would have kicked him out the first time it happened. instead all i did was cry and try to prove that i knew how to cook and i tried to lose weight and i tried be ambitious enough for him and tried to be good enough for him and i never was.
August 24, 2015 - 8:54pmBut... it makes sense. Me, thinking it was normal for the man I love to make me cry. After all, the first man in my life was good at making me cry. My dad was good at that especially when he was drunk.
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