My wife and I are going through a separation for this exact thing. I truthfully realize how bad I hurt her, and I am getting help to attempt to fix our marriage. I now take medication to help with it after years of thinking I can fix myself. At times it seems like this separation is pointless because she doesn't seem to try. We have 2 children, I come home after work and she goes to her friends house for the nights I don't go to my aunts(where I am staying on days I don't stay at my house) this way I still see my children. She never wants to talk about anything about this whole situation which is where I'm starting to lose faith that we will work things out. I feel like that will kill whatever chances we have of saving our marriage. Especially after she told me she no longer loves me, but says she knows me without my anger issues can be an amazing person she loves. That makes it intensely confusing.
The other day, she told me she will heal, but not will be on her own time, this after she told me about 5 books she wants to get to help her heal, and to help me stop being abusive. I asked if that meant we would get back together in the future, she told me I shouldn't be jumping to conclusions, yet can see how i would get that from her saying that. I truthfully have no idea what to do to try and keep my family together. I feel I'm already putting in 70 % of the work to fix things, but she won't even give 30% to attempt to fix things.
She's even told me she can see how much I've changed, still she won't talk to me about it and feels everything she is doing is correct , without getting a professional opinion until next week,but am I just delaying the inevitable divorce? And just like wasting time even trying to fix our family?
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My wife and I are going through a separation for this exact thing. I truthfully realize how bad I hurt her, and I am getting help to attempt to fix our marriage. I now take medication to help with it after years of thinking I can fix myself. At times it seems like this separation is pointless because she doesn't seem to try. We have 2 children, I come home after work and she goes to her friends house for the nights I don't go to my aunts(where I am staying on days I don't stay at my house) this way I still see my children. She never wants to talk about anything about this whole situation which is where I'm starting to lose faith that we will work things out. I feel like that will kill whatever chances we have of saving our marriage. Especially after she told me she no longer loves me, but says she knows me without my anger issues can be an amazing person she loves. That makes it intensely confusing.
The other day, she told me she will heal, but not will be on her own time, this after she told me about 5 books she wants to get to help her heal, and to help me stop being abusive. I asked if that meant we would get back together in the future, she told me I shouldn't be jumping to conclusions, yet can see how i would get that from her saying that. I truthfully have no idea what to do to try and keep my family together. I feel I'm already putting in 70 % of the work to fix things, but she won't even give 30% to attempt to fix things.
She's even told me she can see how much I've changed, still she won't talk to me about it and feels everything she is doing is correct , without getting a professional opinion until next week,but am I just delaying the inevitable divorce? And just like wasting time even trying to fix our family?
July 20, 2015 - 3:16pmThis Comment
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