I have been searching online for answers for somewhat the same thing. I don't know if I have a personality disorder, multiple personalities, or jokingly, spiritual possession sometimes. What happens to me is that i also smoke marijuana, and alcohol just triggers it even more and takes it up another level. In the past, I used to remember everything, or when drunk, at least I would know and remember. As of about 5 years, I would get drunk and have gaps of memory loss causing a blackout. I would dance, and flirt with a lot of men, and even drive, not knowing which route I drove home, nonetheless, how I got home. People see me as if nothing is wrong with me, perhaps just a little tipsy, not knowing that I will not remember a thing of my conversation wth them. When I ask, they tell me I look normal. My friends would tell me that they thought I was just having fun and being drunk, but when I have no recollection of events it's alarming and do not like to discuss what it can and may be. However, I allow myself to drink more than usual around close friends, and those close friends would tell me that I am 'wild' when I drink. Thank God, I am not a violent person, or have ever been in that position while in this state. At the beginning, I used to smoke and drink and never experienced any blackouts. I'm in my late 30s now, and believe this started about 5 years ago. I am not a drinker (only in my 20s and party days), only drink at social events, so I don't have an alcohol problem, nor am I an alcoholic. Ironically, I dislike the taste of alcohol when I'm sober, and do not like the hangover effect the day. With marijuana, it's more tempting because it does not have any after effects the next day. When I do smoke (no alcohol) and am by myself, I just dont enjoy the high as I was when I was younger, or with friends. Depending on my mood (personality), I do things that I normally would not do when sober or under the influence. It's like I enter a different dimension/trance and my senses sharpened, but then I do not remember anything (even with marijuana). When I do mix it up with alcohol, it's like a different person, and that's when I "catch" myself being 'different. I've tried recording myself and do not see anything out of the ordinary and then the next day I would see the video and vaguely remember any acts from the video. Please note that I believe in God. I also do believe that there are also other forces that take advantage of your being while in this alcohol/marijuana induced state. I do not want to get into that spiritual discussion in this thread, but do know that scientifically it may be diagnosed as a mental disorder, personality order. I am all for scientific evidence, but do know that there is more to what is happening during this state, which is why we are looking for answers. I like to have an open mind for all triggers that change your personality or 'take over' you. At this point, I do not know if it's Multiple Personality Disorder, Borderline Disorder, or what, but I need to keep looking.
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I have been searching online for answers for somewhat the same thing. I don't know if I have a personality disorder, multiple personalities, or jokingly, spiritual possession sometimes. What happens to me is that i also smoke marijuana, and alcohol just triggers it even more and takes it up another level. In the past, I used to remember everything, or when drunk, at least I would know and remember. As of about 5 years, I would get drunk and have gaps of memory loss causing a blackout. I would dance, and flirt with a lot of men, and even drive, not knowing which route I drove home, nonetheless, how I got home. People see me as if nothing is wrong with me, perhaps just a little tipsy, not knowing that I will not remember a thing of my conversation wth them. When I ask, they tell me I look normal. My friends would tell me that they thought I was just having fun and being drunk, but when I have no recollection of events it's alarming and do not like to discuss what it can and may be. However, I allow myself to drink more than usual around close friends, and those close friends would tell me that I am 'wild' when I drink. Thank God, I am not a violent person, or have ever been in that position while in this state. At the beginning, I used to smoke and drink and never experienced any blackouts. I'm in my late 30s now, and believe this started about 5 years ago. I am not a drinker (only in my 20s and party days), only drink at social events, so I don't have an alcohol problem, nor am I an alcoholic. Ironically, I dislike the taste of alcohol when I'm sober, and do not like the hangover effect the day. With marijuana, it's more tempting because it does not have any after effects the next day. When I do smoke (no alcohol) and am by myself, I just dont enjoy the high as I was when I was younger, or with friends. Depending on my mood (personality), I do things that I normally would not do when sober or under the influence. It's like I enter a different dimension/trance and my senses sharpened, but then I do not remember anything (even with marijuana). When I do mix it up with alcohol, it's like a different person, and that's when I "catch" myself being 'different. I've tried recording myself and do not see anything out of the ordinary and then the next day I would see the video and vaguely remember any acts from the video. Please note that I believe in God. I also do believe that there are also other forces that take advantage of your being while in this alcohol/marijuana induced state. I do not want to get into that spiritual discussion in this thread, but do know that scientifically it may be diagnosed as a mental disorder, personality order. I am all for scientific evidence, but do know that there is more to what is happening during this state, which is why we are looking for answers. I like to have an open mind for all triggers that change your personality or 'take over' you. At this point, I do not know if it's Multiple Personality Disorder, Borderline Disorder, or what, but I need to keep looking.
November 28, 2015 - 4:00pmThis Comment
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