When my father's prognosis (he had cancer) was very poor, the doctor lied to my mother about it. Because of this, she had much less time to adjust to the thought of losing her husband and to prepare for it. It came as a shock a few days later (she had been told it could be weeks or months). Not all the family was able to be there. Because this doctor wasn't strong enough to look my mother in the eye and tell her how bad things were, it affected her and our entire family in numerous negative ways.
I think many doctors confuse honesty and compassion when they have to break bad news to a family. And yes, there may be some people who would rather not know. But the bottom line is that the patient's family should own the information, not the doctor. Keeping information from a patient and their family denies them the ability to make decisions and confront reality.
Doctors may think that to give a very poor prognosis will take away hope. I don't think that's true. We as hunans are very adept at accepting a new bottom line and staying hopeful in spite of it. What keeping that prognosis to themselves takes from a family is far worse than hope.
Every patient is different, every family is different and every doctor is different. But a doctor sees hundreds of patients in a year, and a patient has only one life. It seems like the patient's needs for information should prevail.
Comment Reply
When my father's prognosis (he had cancer) was very poor, the doctor lied to my mother about it. Because of this, she had much less time to adjust to the thought of losing her husband and to prepare for it. It came as a shock a few days later (she had been told it could be weeks or months). Not all the family was able to be there. Because this doctor wasn't strong enough to look my mother in the eye and tell her how bad things were, it affected her and our entire family in numerous negative ways.
I think many doctors confuse honesty and compassion when they have to break bad news to a family. And yes, there may be some people who would rather not know. But the bottom line is that the patient's family should own the information, not the doctor. Keeping information from a patient and their family denies them the ability to make decisions and confront reality.
Doctors may think that to give a very poor prognosis will take away hope. I don't think that's true. We as hunans are very adept at accepting a new bottom line and staying hopeful in spite of it. What keeping that prognosis to themselves takes from a family is far worse than hope.
Every patient is different, every family is different and every doctor is different. But a doctor sees hundreds of patients in a year, and a patient has only one life. It seems like the patient's needs for information should prevail.
December 29, 2009 - 8:41amThis Comment
Reply