if i can help the wives and help them survive then i will.thank god most kids are diagnosed now,so new wives will know what they are taking on.then they can decide to marry or not.in the carers group i go to most wives have had breakdown of some sort over the years usualy caused by low self esteem.
when the only time your husband speaks to you is to tell you that you are doing everything wrong,you believe it in the end,its not you they are critising,its PUTTING YOU RIGHT,ITS MY WAY OR ITS WRONG,they genuinly believe this.
yes after years of research and self help and special councilling for a/s wives.i have given up trying to change my a/s husband.
i am more assertive/more direct/non confrontational/realize he will never change.
i mourned for the marriage i hoped i would have one day,i tried 40 yrs to get him to love me.i know now he loves me in his own way,not as much as the dog,but he loves me.
relationship is so different now.i dont feel like a wife and lover,i feel like his friend and housekeeper,i can accept that at 63 ,i could not have accepted that at 18 when i married.i lived in hope we would have normal??? marriage one day.
as my husband grew up with aspergers mother and sibling to him that was a normal life.its still how most of his family live.most are divorced,but still blame their non a/s partner,so sad/
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if i can help the wives and help them survive then i will.thank god most kids are diagnosed now,so new wives will know what they are taking on.then they can decide to marry or not.in the carers group i go to most wives have had breakdown of some sort over the years usualy caused by low self esteem.
November 20, 2010 - 9:52amwhen the only time your husband speaks to you is to tell you that you are doing everything wrong,you believe it in the end,its not you they are critising,its PUTTING YOU RIGHT,ITS MY WAY OR ITS WRONG,they genuinly believe this.
yes after years of research and self help and special councilling for a/s wives.i have given up trying to change my a/s husband.
i am more assertive/more direct/non confrontational/realize he will never change.
i mourned for the marriage i hoped i would have one day,i tried 40 yrs to get him to love me.i know now he loves me in his own way,not as much as the dog,but he loves me.
relationship is so different now.i dont feel like a wife and lover,i feel like his friend and housekeeper,i can accept that at 63 ,i could not have accepted that at 18 when i married.i lived in hope we would have normal??? marriage one day.
as my husband grew up with aspergers mother and sibling to him that was a normal life.its still how most of his family live.most are divorced,but still blame their non a/s partner,so sad/
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