Hey, my boyfriend and I are both 21, and I had the same problem with him. We've been together for a year a half, and it's basically the exact same story you have up here. First off, do not assume that he's cheating on you. I'm a sucker for nice guys, and my boyfriend is no different, and though some boys like to make excuses and say that it's human nature to cheat that is just a stupid way to dismiss selfishness and immorality towards another person.
Part of my boyfriend's problems stemmed from being exposed to porn at a young age (around 12) and then hearing about how dirty it was at church, so he spent so much time trying to block that all out that he had trouble enjoying it without feeling guilty.
Plus, he gets more enjoyment out of awesome conversation than physical action. (just throwing it out there because all guys and all girls are different, we're not cookie cutters)
What helped me: We actually spent too much time together. I spent more time with my friends without him and him with his without me, and we did more group activities together. This meant that if he wanted me he couldn't just have me whenever. It's kinda like you want what you can't have. Be a little bit of a challenge. He also started exercising again. He was the captain of the swim team, but hadn't really been in shape since high school, so once he started exercising he had more confidence being naked and feeling like he looked good, and I'm sure the endorphins helped. So hang out more with your friends to get a little bit of space, go travel or something, try to inspire him to try out for a mini-marathon if he's the competitive type, or compliment him on how he does things. Also to spice things up you can always look online at cosmo.
Comment Reply
Hey, my boyfriend and I are both 21, and I had the same problem with him. We've been together for a year a half, and it's basically the exact same story you have up here. First off, do not assume that he's cheating on you. I'm a sucker for nice guys, and my boyfriend is no different, and though some boys like to make excuses and say that it's human nature to cheat that is just a stupid way to dismiss selfishness and immorality towards another person.
Part of my boyfriend's problems stemmed from being exposed to porn at a young age (around 12) and then hearing about how dirty it was at church, so he spent so much time trying to block that all out that he had trouble enjoying it without feeling guilty.
Plus, he gets more enjoyment out of awesome conversation than physical action. (just throwing it out there because all guys and all girls are different, we're not cookie cutters)
What helped me: We actually spent too much time together. I spent more time with my friends without him and him with his without me, and we did more group activities together. This meant that if he wanted me he couldn't just have me whenever. It's kinda like you want what you can't have. Be a little bit of a challenge. He also started exercising again. He was the captain of the swim team, but hadn't really been in shape since high school, so once he started exercising he had more confidence being naked and feeling like he looked good, and I'm sure the endorphins helped. So hang out more with your friends to get a little bit of space, go travel or something, try to inspire him to try out for a mini-marathon if he's the competitive type, or compliment him on how he does things. Also to spice things up you can always look online at cosmo.
Good luck miss!
June 27, 2010 - 8:47amThis Comment
Reply