Pat ElliottExpertHERWriterGuideBlogger(reply to Shattered_Soul)
Hi Shattered Soul - Welcome to EmpowHer, I'm glad you've found us and that you feel comfortable talking about your situation. I'm sure it was difficult for you to write about both your past and present experiences. It's certainly understandable that you would feel you can't discuss your feelings and wishes with your husband. Do you think it would be possible to get him to participate in joint counseling? It might be helpful for you, no matter what, to find a skilled mental health or other type of unbiased and impartial counselor who you can speak with freely - one who will work with you to build up your own self-esteem and sense of self worth and your ability to establish boundaries. You may, or may not, also want to work with the counselor on resolving other concerns. When and if you become comfortable with that counselor you could consider asking your husband to join you in some counseling sessions, in a safe supportive environment outside of your home, in which you can openly discuss your needs and work on getting him to understand that the way he is treating you is not appropriate and is harmful. Does that make sense to you? Is this information helpful? Are there other ways we can help? Please let us know, we're here for you.
Take care, Pat
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Hi Shattered Soul - Welcome to EmpowHer, I'm glad you've found us and that you feel comfortable talking about your situation. I'm sure it was difficult for you to write about both your past and present experiences. It's certainly understandable that you would feel you can't discuss your feelings and wishes with your husband. Do you think it would be possible to get him to participate in joint counseling? It might be helpful for you, no matter what, to find a skilled mental health or other type of unbiased and impartial counselor who you can speak with freely - one who will work with you to build up your own self-esteem and sense of self worth and your ability to establish boundaries. You may, or may not, also want to work with the counselor on resolving other concerns. When and if you become comfortable with that counselor you could consider asking your husband to join you in some counseling sessions, in a safe supportive environment outside of your home, in which you can openly discuss your needs and work on getting him to understand that the way he is treating you is not appropriate and is harmful. Does that make sense to you? Is this information helpful? Are there other ways we can help? Please let us know, we're here for you.
February 18, 2010 - 1:33pmTake care, Pat
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