I am an 18 year old teen. I became pregnant with twins when I was 16. When I found out I was pregnant I felt like my dignity had been stripped from me. I felt like I was nobody worth being. People can make you feel so down, so low, and it isn’t right! Not only was it just people putting me down, but my family. Girls need to rise above situations like that. Yeah, I know it can look shameful, but we are human beings also! All the stress of everyone’s opinions caused me to go into labor 3 months early and they were less than 1 pound. One of my twins past away and the other had to stay 4 months in the hospital, and I couldn’t hold him for one month. I call him my miracle baby and he has just turned one a couple of weeks ago. Now looking back at it, I realize people weren’t worth stressing over. I should have known better than to let people bring me down. I have learned so much from having my son “too early.” I have grown to a woman, I have matured, and I have realized what’s important in life and what’s not.
I have worked hard to become financially stable, and I make sure girls like me do not feel ashamed, but embrace the gift they have been given. I would love to start a support system for young mothers, because I want them to know they are not alone. Don’t think having a baby early will stop you. You can still be something, still become successful! It just means you’ve had a minor set back, but if anything you should work ten times harder in life. I think of him as my motivation and inspiration.
Re: Teen Pregnancy
Thank you for sharing your story, and I'm so sorry to hear that one of your twins had passed away.
What's keeping you from starting a support group? A couple of the high schools in my area struggle with this, but have still established support groups for teen parents to help them finish school, learn parenting skills and financial responsibility, etc. I'm sure others would appreciate the advice and experience you have to share.
How is your son doing? Why did he have to stay in hospital for so long, if you don't mind my asking?
Posted: Mon., May 5, 2008, 07:18 pm
Re: Teen Pregnancy
Your story really touched my heart. I'm so glad to hear that one of your preemies is doing so well! (I have a preemie, who was born 2 months early, and he is 18 months old!) :-)
I was in my 30s when I had my son, but still felt "too young" and overwhelmed...I am glad to hear that you are feeling better about your situation, and have a wonderful son.
Do you have a good support system (family, friends, etc?), because you sound like you are doing well.
I was struggling with being a new mom, and found a "new mom group" at our local hospital. I realize you are looking for a group that primarily includes moms your own age. I just googled "young mom support" and there hundreds of support groups! One looked interesting: themommiesnetwork.org (I am not advocating for them; I did not research their affiliation or philosophy).
There are also national clubs, like the MOMs Club (with local chapters), and many local gyms have mommy-and-me classes (I'm sure you already know this), where you could meet other young moms and all get together to start your own support group. Our city has a free magazine published monthly, and includes advertisements for local mom/family gatherings. Your local newspaper or media also may know of young mom support groups.
When I worked at a large university, we often had small groups of students request facilitated support group from our professional staff on specific issues. Do you have a university near you? Many universities also have very close connections with local high schools, who could also provide assistance with starting a support group.
Speaking of support groups: do you know what type of support group you are looking for? There is just a few things to figure out, whether you want it facilitated by a professional or more casual conversation with like-minded friends. If you need a location, local libraries often have free space that is under-utilized and available for group meetings.
Let us know what you find! I'm sure you've already found some great resources, since you are barely a "new mom" anymore with a one year old!
Lastly, feel free to send me a private message and I can do some research for you...since you are a busy woman!...to see what's available in your city.
Posted: Tue., May 6, 2008, 01:23 pm
Support groups for mothers
Alison is right on the money about support groups for mothers - there are hundreds - probably thousands of them!
One group is called MatchingMoms.com. Join, type in your zip code and up will come info on all the members in your area, how many kids they have and their ages. It's a fantastic way to connect with like-minded or similarly-situated mothers. It is also free.
Of course, this is a website that is based on moms meeting in real life, so all due caution must be taken.
I am so sorry to read of your loss of your baby but delighted to know your son is doing well.
Have your considered placing an ad for a support group in your local community center or church or colleges? Have you thought about starting one on-line?
Posted: Wed., May 7, 2008, 12:30 pm
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